Several family members and friends mentioned that they enjoyed reading my blog adventures from Japan and so this is for you! Since the last blog post I have been very busy. You know just popping out two babies in Japan, moving to Oklahoma and then moving again to Korea. (South Korea obviously)
We loved our time in Japan and definitely made the most of it. We had several trips to ski resorts, Tokyo, and nearby castles. Yes, Japan has castles. I won't post all about it here because, well, that's not what I want to talk about.
I want to talk about what happens when you live somewhere for 3 whole years and then have to move to the worst place on the planet. (opinion, not fact. Sorry Oklahoma, you just weren't my cup of tea.)
We had great friends in Japan. Like actual real life couple friends. For the first time since being married we had friends. Friends that you could call in the middle of the night to come sleep on your couch while you went to the ER with your sick kid. Friends that would call you in the middle of the night because they had bad news from home and needed a friend to talk to. Friends that would walk in your door without knocking wearing pajamas and slippers because they knew you would also be in pajamas. At 3 in the afternoon. Yes, I am talking about those kind of friends. The ones that stick with you forever. The ones that make you mad at the Army for taking you away too soon. The ones that you cry over because you had to leave and they got to stay. Do you get the picture?
So here I am in Oklahoma, a place I didn't really want to be to begin with, crying my eyes out because it hurts to make friends. I shut people out because I didn't want to go through that kind of heartbreak again. And you know what? That sucked! (I'm not crying..... you're crying) I am here to testify to you that taking time to make friend is IMPORTANT! It hurts and it sucks when you have to leave those friends, but it makes each move possible. I was completely miserable in Oklahoma so when the surprise orders to Korea came I was overjoyed! To be back in a somewhat familiar country with friends only a 3 hour flight away sounded like a dream! We jumped at the opportunity and now here we are in Korea. I am happier than I have been in a while, but what about my kids? Are they happy? Did they shut themselves out so they wouldn't have any broken connections in Oklahoma? No. They are more resilient than their mother. They made friends, they adjusted, they were happy! What about now? Are they happy now? Well most of them are. In fact 75% of them are happy and have friends. So I should just run with the statistics that the majority are happy and we are good, right? If we were talking about goldfish instead of children I would say yes. But these are actual human beings that I have to live with every day.
The Army never tells you that your child is going to have a hard time adjusting. They tell you how to help them adjust. They don't tell you those methods aren't going to work for some kids. My heart aches for my oldest. He has had a really hard time making friends, he is awkward and a little chubby. (my husband assures me that he will hit a growth spurt and stretch it all out) He comes home from school moody and angry. He says that he doesn't fit in with the cool kids. My heart goes out to him because we all know I wasn't the cool kid either. I am not athletic, I was in orchestra though no great talent their either. I didn't feel like I was cute, or confident. I feel for him, I really do. But when he insists on wearing clothes that are too small ( he has plenty that fit) and then gets made fun of because his belly showed every time he raised his hand, I have little patience for him. Yesterday was pajama day. He doesn't wear pajamas at home so we don't buy him more than a pair a year. You know the ones. The obligatory Christmas gift pajamas. Well its almost November now so those ones that fit him last year, don't fit him so well now. He came home in tears. Then this morning what does he do? He puts on a shirt that is too small and won't change it. You can see why my patience is lacking. I don't know what to do for him yet. I am open to suggestions. And yes this was rather rambling, but it is what has been on my mind. So go out there and make a friend today!
